


Can’t sleep (without you)

by ElleKing27



Category: IZONE (Band)
Genre: Eunbi has a lot on her mind, Exes, F/F, Fluff, Hyewon has trouble sleeping, Mild Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:41:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25989136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ElleKing27/pseuds/ElleKing27
Summary: For the second time that night, I go against my better judgment and tap on your picture. It’s somewhere sunny. Are you at a beach? I can’t really tell but you’re definitely somewhere windy seeing as your hair is flying about. You cut your hair too. Short hair looks nice on you. A small smile appears on my lips. You look as pretty as always.OrWhere Hyewon doesn’t understand why she can’t seem to fall asleep tonight. It’s especially annoying when she has work tomorrow. But then she gets a call from her ex, Eunbi. And suddenly, she’s understood why.
Relationships: Kang Hyewon/Kwon Eunbi
Comments: 1
Kudos: 87





	Can’t sleep (without you)

**Author's Note:**

> Something I wrote in the middle of the night.  
> Hope you'll enjoy it :)
> 
> Follow me at twitter for more of me @cheesyisthyname

//

  


_Tick. Tick. Tick._

Have you ever had a day where everything was just so slow? Nothing dramatic or particularly exciting happens throughout the day. How you could somehow feel it from the moment you woke up that morning. Like everything was too quiet, too peaceful. Time moves like a sloth that day and even the weather seems intent to be as tranquil as possible. A slow breeze through the window or maybe the unusual quietness of your commute.

All of it just making the slowness more apparent.

Don’t get me wrong. It doesn’t necessarily mean those days are bad or anything like that. If anything, some of my favorite days are precisely those kinds of days. Sometimes we need to slow down.

However, it seems that it wasn’t enough during the day because the slowness of everything decided to drag on until late at night. At this rate, it might even stay till morning. I would’ve preferred if it just went away right now though. It’s a weekday and I still need to go to work tomorrow. Being late yesterday was enough, I don’t want to be late again today.

It seems like time wants to disagree with me tonight.

I don’t get it. It wasn’t like today was particularly stressful or anything like that. As I said, it was a slow peaceful day today. Or maybe is it precisely because it was a slow day that I’m like this? I sigh out in annoyance. I really need to sleep.

Turning to my side, the sight of my clock comes to my view. Lit by the sliver of moonlight escaping from the curtains. It’s 2 a.m. Faintly, I could still hear the traffic down in the streets. I shouldn’t have expected any less from the city that doesn’t sleep, but you have to ask though. What are all those people doing this late at night?

A long day at work and they’re only going back now? Partying hard for some occasion? Or maybe a late rendezvous with a special someone? The last one makes me chuckle a little. Wouldn’t that be exciting?

You used to say that you would’ve liked to go on those late-night drives, didn’t you? Back then when we were still stupid teenagers without a license. Still dreaming big with our naivety. Now, the only thing I am is a cynical office worker. I got a license though, Eun. Got it last year actually when I realized I could actually afford a car now. Albeit a beat-up second-hand car that still smells faintly of smoke, but hey at least it works and I’m showering that thing with Febreze every week.

Eunbi, I wonder how you’re doing these days. Did you realize your dreams? You know about being a singer. I still remember how you used to make me listen to you sing every day. Asking if you sounded okay or not, but honestly, it was a stupid question. I don’t think I’ve ever heard you sing out of tune even once. You’ll always sound beautiful to me.

Actually, never mind, why am I even asking? I still remember the offer you took years ago. An offer to learn from—in your own words—the best of the best. You’re probably a great singer now. Maybe not a famous one—seeing as how I’m not seeing your face in billboards yet—but I know you’ll content as long as you’re singing. Or at least, I hope you are.

A smile looks better on your face.

Wait a second, why am I thinking of you? I need to go to sleep.

Glancing to the side, I take a peek at the clock. Just a few minutes shy from being half-past two. Can time go any slower? Because honestly, a turtle can walk a kilometer and it would still feel faster than this.

Instinctively, my hand wanders off to my phone, and against my better judgment, I open it up. Yes, I know fully well against the dangers of blue light towards sleep and yada yada yada. Ugh, I could still hear you nagging to me about it too.

_“You always complain about not being able to sleep at night and yet you do this.”_

_“Hey, I’m the normal one here. Everyone looks at their phone before sleeping. You’re just a goodie two shoes.”_

_“And I’m content on being a goodie two shoes if it means I can sleep peacefully. Give it.”_

_“What? My phone? No way.”_

_“Yes! Come on, if you’re so bored, then let’s talk instead. I could be the big spoon!”_

The fact that that conversation took place in this exact same apartment, in this exact same bed, can’t seem to leave my mind.

It was only for a few months that we lived in this apartment before you took off because of that offer. The lease was supposed to last for a year. You kept sending me your share even though you didn’t live here anymore. You told me to get my own place after it ends because this place is too big for myself.

It’s been three years and I’m still here.

You would’ve said that I’m being stubborn like a horse if you knew about it. If you were here to say it. But I don’t see either of that happening any time soon.

I can’t help it. We decorated this place together even though we were only broke university students back then. It might’ve only been a few months, but we made too many memories in this place for me to ever leave it.

It looks like my mind can’t stay off of you tonight. Then again, when has it ever?

Eyes not even focusing on the opened app on my phone. Maybe I should do something else. Wasn’t there a tip saying drinking something warm will make you sleepy?

Getting up from the bed, I walk to the kitchen. Phone still in hand. Aimlessly scrolling through Instagram or Twitter or anything really. I pause for a bit to look through the cabinets. There’s coffee, tea, and some hot cocoa left. Coffee is definitely out. Tea is fine but I don’t have the relaxing kind—you know the one you always drink saying it’s _‘melting me’_. You’ve always had one for the dramatics.

Guess I’ll make some hot cocoa instead.

I could make it the legit way using the stove or I could make it using the microwave. Yeah, let’s just use the microwave.

However, in the middle of pouring milk, my phone rings with a notification. That’s odd. It’s usually on vibrate. Oh well, I must’ve mistakenly pressed the volume button or something. Taking a look at my phone, I open my messages. Bleh, I thought someone texted me but it’s just spam. I move my fingers to delete the message but then I take a glimpse at a certain contact. One that I haven’t texted in a long time.

Oh, you changed your profile picture again.

For the second time that night, I go against my better judgment and tap on your picture. It’s somewhere sunny. Are you at a beach? I can’t really tell but you’re definitely somewhere windy seeing as your hair is flying about. You cut your hair too. Short hair looks nice on you. A small smile appears on my lips. You look as pretty as always.

_**Ring! Ring! Ring!** _

Oh, my fucking god, I almost had a heart attack! God damn!

I grabbed my chest to calm myself down after practically jumping in place. Out of all the times someone could pick to call you, why _now_? Who the heck is it anyway? I look down back to the screen, and holy shit, it’s _you_.

Why are you calling me? And more importantly, why at this hour? Did you get drunk and called me by mistake or something? Or did you get hurt and— _oh god_ , what if you got hurt?

Quickly, I answer the phone. Silently praying that nothing bad had happened to you.

“H—Hello?” I unsurely say.

“Hey, it’s, um, it’s me.” You sound a bit hesitant, but otherwise, I’m not hearing any pain or slur. Okay, so, you’re neither in any danger nor are you drunk. That’s good.

But now I’m left with this awkwardness. It’s inevitable when you haven’t spoken a word to each other in years. I suppose some people would immediately act like they’re close again. As if they never left each other. Big exclamations and excited greetings. But we’re not that type. Not when you remember your last conversation with her so clearly.

“Oh,” I feel hesitant too. “It’s been a while.”

“It has.”

There’s this… pause. Both of us unsure of what to say. It’s nice to hear from her again but I don’t know. What to feel, what to say, how to even act around her. I don’t know. I used to know a lot though. So much so to the point that being with you felt as natural as breathing.

Isn’t it sad how we’re reduced to ‘someone I used to know’ for each other?

“What’s wrong? It’s rare for you to call me.” More like never. It’s okay though. I became used to it after the 14th _‘I’m busy right now but call me later, okay?’._

“Nothing’s wrong. I just…”

“Just?”

“Just… no reason.”

“Oh.”

“Would,” you hesitate again, “would it be too selfish of me to say that I miss you?”

A deep breath and my grip on the countertop tighten. I almost want to laugh at that question. Almost. Instead, I’m fighting off the slow creeping needles in my lungs. It’s getting a bit harder to breathe here.

“That’s—” I pause for a bit, wondering what I should say. “That is a bit selfish. Yes.”

I let out a short laugh.

“But I would be lying if I say I didn’t miss you too.”

“I see.” I wonder if that was relief in your voice or something else. “Where are you now?”

“Home,” is all I say. I wonder if you understand the meaning behind it. “Where else could I be?”

“I know.” You chuckle. “I meant where do you live now.”

“Why? Are planning on visiting?” I joke, thinking that it would be impossible for you to visit when you’re not even in the same country as I am. But you clearly turned all of my expectations on their heads.

“Yeah.”

“Wait, are you back here or do you have a fli—”

“I just got back. My plane landed a few hours ago,” you tell me and I am, to say the least, dumbfounded.

“Oh.” Despite that, it seems the only words that can leave my mouth is just that.

“So, uh, where do you live?” You ask me again, snapping me out of my shock. “I won’t visit you now if that’s too much. Maybe tomorrow? Oh wait, you’ll have work tomorrow, won’t you? So, maybe on the weekends instead? I can just go with your schedule too. It’s not like I’m in a hurry or anything since I won’t be going anywhere anytime soon.”

“Are you staying for good?” My hand stopped gripping the countertop a while ago. But the feeling won’t fade away. It's hard to describe it. An amalgam of different emotions that really shouldn’t be felt together. But one stands out from the rest though.

Hope.

It’s almost pathetic that I could still feel hope even after all these years. Even after the unread messages and rings that never end. It’s almost pathetic how I can’t even blame you for all of that. You’re only chasing your dream. How could I ever hate you for that?

Even more so when you said you missed me. Yeah, I know it’s not much. But god fucking damn it, it’s the most I got from you in three fucking years and I am holding onto that like a lifeline. I know I shouldn’t and I know I’ll probably only get hurt even more. But I haven’t been the same ever since you left, and hell, there’s already stinging behind my eyes. I still don’t care.

It’s you.

“I told you, Hye. I’m not going anywhere.”

Neither of us says anything for a while. You, because you’re waiting for me, and me, because I’m too busy trying to control my emotions. I let out a shaky breath.

“It’s still the same,” I softly tell you. “I haven’t moved anywhere else, Eun. I’m still here.”

“You didn’t move?”

“How could I?” A teary laugh but a laugh anyway.

“I,” you pause for a second. “Can I go there?”

Leaning against the kitchen cabinets, I let out another chuckle.

“You’re always welcome here, Eun. It’s your home too.”

“Even—Even though I haven’t paid my share for two and a half years? Even though I haven’t been there in three?” Your voice cracks. “Even though I left you behind? Left us?”

“Mhm, even so.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“I’ll be there in twenty—no, fifteen.”

“Aren’t you at the airport?”

“No, I’m at a station, and I’ll be there soon. So, um…”

“I’ll be waiting, Eun.”

“Okay. I’ll see you, Hye.”

You know those days where everything feels so slow? Where everything just feels so tranquil and peaceful? How you could feel it from the moment you wake up? It’s like the world just slows down for a day. Right now, it forms in the shape of the unmoving stars. In the soft moonlight. In the faint murmurs of the fridge and the low hum of the microwave. And most importantly, in the muffled footsteps outside of my apartment door.

Nothing dramatic nor anything exciting happens throughout the day nor night. After all, it’s just my love coming back to me.

When I opened the door that night, I smiled at you and you hugged me tightly. I could hear you sniffling but I didn’t comment on it. Instead, I pulled you into the kitchen. Your luggage was left forgotten at the front door. We’ll sort that out tomorrow. I gave you a cup of hot cocoa. I heard it’s comforting. Good for falling asleep too according to some parts of the internet.

“I didn’t have your chamomile.” I had said to you.

“That’s fine.” You smiled back at me. “I like hot chocolate too.”

Sleep didn’t come easily to me that night. It had approached me like a turtle that’s a kilometer away. I didn’t understand why when there was nothing particularly hard on me that day. Technically, it wasn’t even the same day anymore, but I had realized my day had never been complete. None of it has. Not until you came back into my arms at least.

You’re finally here.

When sleep finally came to me, breathing in your lavender scent, I was happy.

So, you know those slow days, right? You see, I like them a lot. But I think this might be the best one yet.

(

_“Can I love you again, Hye?”_

_“I never stopped loving you, Eun.”_

)

//

**Author's Note:**

> Tell me what you think about the fic in the comments down below! :D


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